By the time I wandered back out of my own thoughts, Allie had moved on to the massage booth, priced their wares, and returned to where I was checking out the candle selection. “Want to go do something else for a bit?” I suggested.
“Not much to do in Evansborough on a Saturday. What did you have in mind?”
I’d become a real caffeine hound. “How about finding a place that makes a latte?”
Allie laughed. “Good luck. Actually, now that I think of it, the restaurant might have an espresso machine. It’s worth a shot at least.”
We gathered our coats and scarves from behind the jewelry table, told Charlene we’d be back, and walked into the crisp November air. We could have easily walked, but chose to be warm inside my car instead. Turning on to main street was a treat, as the snow had been packed down enough to obscure all lines designating lanes. I wasn’t worried, though. It was a small town with little to no traffic, and most everyone was up at the bazaar. About halfway down we spotted the Wagon Wheel, a little hometown restaurant, and I turned across the street to park.
The curb we pulled up to was painted yellow, something I hadn’t seen from the road. “Awww, man, this isn’t a valid parking spot at all!” Car still running, I sat there weighing my options. “We won’t be here very long,” Allie offered. “And it’s Evansborough, and I’m pretty sure I saw the only cop in town up at the bazaar.”
As she was speaking, I noticed a little old man who had been shuffling down the sidewalk. He’d stopped when we pulled in, and was staring at us in a very peculiar way. “Uh, Allie, do you think he’s upset that we’re parking in a no parking zone?” She looked over to where I was pointing. “I don’t know.” Her voice lilted a bit with concern. “Is he coming over here?”
“No, no, looks like he’s walking away…wait, now he’s sat down on a bench and he’s still staring! What on earth…,”
A loud rapping on my window nearly made me choke on my heart and I turned around to see an officer only inches from my face. I couldn’t find the door handle fast enough. “Yes, sir, what is it?” I managed to gasp out.
“Miss, now, I realize that there’s a lot of snow on the ground, and you can’t see the lines, but you cannot take a left in the middle of a street to park. That’s illegal. Were you aware of that?” I nodded, my eyes unable to tear themselves away from the handle-bar mustache that was wagging in front of my face. I defy even Wyatt Earp himself to find such a mustache I thought, as the thing continued to wag. “Whatcha gotta do is drive all the way down to the end of the street, make a U-turn, and then drive back down and park the legal way. Am I making myself clear?” I nodded again, this time because I knew if I spoke, all that would come out was laughter. Make a U-turn? Do something that is generally known as dangerous and expressly forbidden in exchange for something I did getting my coffee every morning at home? And that mustache! It was really just too much. “I’m letting you off with a warning this time. Just make sure you watch what you’re doin’ next time, alright?”
“Yes sir. Thank you very much sir.” I watched him walk back to his unmarked vehicle that had been parked in the middle of the street through the entire conversation, and didn’t realize until he’d driven away that there’d been no mention of being parked in a spot that wasn’t intended for parking. Allie and I looked at each other and burst out laughing. The nervous energy we’d been holding inside came running down our cheeks till our sides hurt. Wiping away the tears, I looked up to see the old man, who’d been sitting on the same bench the whole time, get up and shuffle on down the street. “Allie! That old man wasn’t going to tell us to move!”
“Whaaa?” She asked, still lost in the sheriff moment.
“The old man! He saw the sheriff stop in the street behind us! He was just waiting to see what was going to happen!” Another fit of laughter took over. “Ohhh, whew, aha..ahahaha…I bet that was the exciting highlight of his week, that old man. Eheh, eheh, ahhhhh.” Forgetting completely about the coffee, we returned to the bazaar to relate our strange story to Charlene and Co. “Oh, that was probably Rudy,” she said, as she laughed along with us. “I saw him here earlier. Oh, here’s his wife now!” I was promptly introduced as the “girl who just got pulled over by your husband”. Not my most favorite introduction ever, but definitely the most unique!
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